Written by Joe Leff
Print this

Friday, 21 December 2012

The winter may be peak season for wrestling bouts, but there is no point in taking anti-biotics to strengthen the holds that wrestlers use on their opponents.

Indeed, say experts, free from anti-biotics, wrestlers with a rasping cough and a belter of a sneeze might add a bit of punch to a Pile-Driver or Gorilla Press.

In recent years, many wrestlers have been taking anti-biotics, partly because they think it is a 'socially acceptable' drug, but mainly because they believe it strengthens arm-holds and masks pain.

However, scientists have now cast doubt on such beliefs.
In an international study, 500 wrestlers were randomly picked up, hurled down on a mat and knelt on by GPs, who gave them either an anti-biotic or a placebo.

Later on, the two groups of wrestlers got their own back on the doctors in the wrestling ring by applying their most powerful holds - such as Torture Rack and Jack Knife.

Little difference was found in either severity or duration of holds.
Those given anti-biotics reported more side effects, according to the report in the Medical Section of Wrestling Times.

"I was alright until I started taking anti-biotics," said Hulk Hogan, "but now my right side really hurts.

Make Joe Leff's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story


Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!


What's 3 multiplied by 3?

1 15 19 9
54 readers are online right now!

Go to top

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more