HARFOLD, Vt. - Harfold State College released this week a study which son-in-laws everywhere will have a hard time swallowing.
Women who quit smoking by the age of 50 dramatically cut risk of an early death, enjoying up to ten to fifteen more years of life.
Although it's quite clear that no son-in-law would wish their wives' moms ill, the prospect of putting up with horse - and bullshit an extra 10 to 15 years sounds more like a prolonged prison sentence than anything else.
"We go to work, we bring home a paycheck, we make sure our kids are clothed, but somehow this isn't good enough," said Harfold State College instructor of biology, Richard Sage.
Asked how this study affects those women who also have mother-in-laws who drive them up a wall, Sage replied, "Mother loves her Richie, and if my Marge doesn't like it, then she can get the hell out."