Written by CaptainSausage

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Wednesday, 15 August 2012

image for New games console released
Field Cannon Simulator

A new games console, the Bandwagon 3000, is being released by a major computer manufacturer next week. Priced at only £99 it is expected to become essential home entertainment for impoverished nerds everywhere.

The console plugs into the TV set and comes with three free games. The first is a darts simulator, which should please all those who have always wanted to play the game from the comfort of their own home.

The second freebie is a TV viewing game, in which the user plays a character who sits in front of his TV all day.

Also included with the console is Field Cannon Simulator, which gives the player the chance to experience firing a piece of 19th century artillery. There is a controller which comes with the game that looks like a full-size plastic cannon. To fire it, the user must first load it with gunpowder, aim it, then light it - all through the use of the various plastic buttons positioned all over the equipment. It truly brings all the fun of the Napoleonic Wars to the living room.

For those gamers who are tired of losing, this console has a brand new original feature which is sure to be popular. At any stage of any game, the player can simply push the bright red "Win" button to ensure they will be victorious.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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