Houston, TX-- Tantalizing photos from the Red Planet are being received here in NASA headquarters tonight. Pictures from the orbiting Mars Express are showing images of a buried alien metropolis underneath the sands of Mars. The unexpected information seems likely to revolutionize almost everything.
The Mars Express has been orbiting Mars for eight years. There were hints that the probe discovered something unusual, but no one expected anything like a buried city. The metropolis is located right at the base of a giant volcano called Olympus Mons and is about the size of New York City.
Scientists are calling the city the Pompeii of Mars because it is buried under about two miles of sand and dust. Scientists believe the city is at least 10 million years old.
Photos from Mars show buildings, streets, spaceports, libraries, stadiums and many unknown alien structures. Scientists think the city may have been some kind of outpost for a gigantic galactic empire. Its value to science and all of mankind is incalculable.
Unfortunately, no one outside of NASA will ever see the photos.
"You have no right to know any of this." declared NASA chief Dr. Karl Saygun. "Work at your little slave jobs and send us your tax money, you pathetic serfs. The stars were not made for peons like you!"