Written by nooklearfishin
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Topics: Las Vegas, Nevada

Wednesday, 24 May 2006

image for Total Immersion Audio, The Nan.Com.Podd, "It's Just A Shot Away."
NanoResonators enter the blood stream when ingested with daily delicious Nan-O-Shakes. (pictured, "Berry Interesting")

Las Vegas, Nevada, Nan.Com Convention -- "I've got you under my skin", crooned a generations "Chairman of the Board", little realizing that the Chairman of another generation would bring Frank Sinatra and countless other artists under the skins of millions of music-lovers world wide. This electronic miracle comes in the form of a single painlessly implanted chip and a delicious daily shake containing antioxidants and non-nutritive nano-resonators.

According to the Nan.com.poop from their promotional material. "Nan-Res tecnology allows you to immerse your entire body in the groove of your choice! The NanoShake (available in 3 flavors: Mango-SantaMaria, Berry Interesting and Apple Cider Addiction) will distribute Nano-Res micro speakers throughout the blood stream."

Chairman Gill Bates of Nan.Com: "We're just a chip away from adding TI (Total Immersion) PoddVideo. We already have the NanoVid eyedrops to coat the optic nerve with receivers. We hope to come up with a Deep-Digital-Vid Chip by Holiday Season 2007."

The enthusiastic reception of this milestone in micro multimedia was marred somewhat by the ejection of a journalist who repeatedly pressed Mr. Bates about internet rumors of rather sinister military applications of Ti technology. Bates, however, recovered from the heckling with a smile and invited the group to "Turn up your Podds, til this guy's gone."

Musical immersion test results suggest that, far from providing a distraction, full body audio enhances performance of workers doing non-demanding repetitive tasks and Business R & D has definitely pricked up the corporate ears to the promise of increased productivity. The unanticipated appetite-suppressing side-effects of the NanoShake could add even more hours to the workday and give more disposable income to the employees for non-food items.

"Is there a paradigm shifting here, or is it just me", quipped Bates as his retreating limo buzzed it's tinted window shut. Paradigm shift or no, the shift in the market place is sliding into place for Nan.Com. yet again. For the third consecutive year, the company's profits have dominated a competitive electronic bid for the consumer's eye, making "the most wanted holiday gift" an exclusive purveyance of the latest gizmo from Nan.Com. Will you be getting Nan.Com under your skin this Xmas?

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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