Written by Lyndon
Print this

Wednesday, 9 May 2012

image for Dinosaur farts warmed planet, but killed mating attempts: study
Not only could this T-Rex rip into your ass, but it could rip its own

HARFOLD, Vt. - In a study released this week by Harfold State College, scientists revealed that dinosaurs were, by far, the worst farters in our planet's history.

Although these farts went a long way in warming the planet, increasing the average temperature by as much as 10• Fahrenheit, it may have been this very expenditure of gas that led to these creatures' extinction.

"Let's face it," says Harfold State College instructor of archeology Priscilla Fontaine. "Rancid, wet farts aren't going to get the job done whether you're man or beast."

The study's most profound conclusion: if one or both mates were ripping ass, and one of them most always was, the chances of hanky panky happening sank to almost null.

Fontaine: "I think we need to take a hard look at what we eat. We can't just assume we can eat all those beans and cabbage and expect others to want to get close to us.

"Our very survival could depend on it. It won't take an asteroid to wipe us out. Just a couple silent but deadlies."

Make Lyndon's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story


Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!


What's 2 multiplied by 1?

7 1 2 12
57 readers are online right now!

Go to top

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more