The name of the Rover is Curiosity. It should arrive on Mars in about three months, and it's designed to do scientific research and take photos.
"In their dreams," said a Martian yesterday, scratching his pointy little head as he talked to a friend on his iPhone. Not knowing that a Spoof reporter based in New York was secretly videotaping him, he continued, "We have other plans."
With a smile, the Martian confided to his friend, "They say curiosity killed the cat, but this particular Curiosity won't be killing anyone. No siree. But it will be making a big killing for us." He then revealed the Martian plan to reverse the direction of the cameras on Curiosity, so that Earth and Earthlings become the observed, instead of the observer.
He explained that, with the ultra-sophisticated equipment on Curiosity, recording for posterity all sorts of out-of-this-world happenings (e.g., backdoor political dealings, 'forbidden' romantic couplings, secret jury deliberations in the most-watched trials of the day) should be a breeze. "You name it, NASA's Curiosity will capture it," the Martian announced with a wink, "and we'll sell all of it to the highest bidder. The National Enquirer, tabloid TV shows, movie companies, book publishers, etc. They will all get in line." The best part of this whole thing, according to the Martian? "NASA will unknowingly be financing the whole deal."
When the Martian completed the phone call he texted his cohorts in crime: "W8 and C we will B rich."
He also saved on his iPhone a text that he'll send at a later date to NASA: "10q 4 making us lots of $."