Written by Jaggedone
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Topics: Babies, iPad , apple

Wednesday, 4 April 2012

image for The iPad3 is too heavy to carry
Baby Apple buyers get a free one of these with every purchase!

The recently released iPad3, which actually comes from a different universe, different milky way and different planet (especially for over 60 year-olds Granny Smiths) seems to have certain deficiencies. The major one is; it seems to be too heavy for six-month old baby's being indoctrinated into the cyber world.

Parents eager to impress the "Apples" of their eyes at the earliest point in their very young lives, i.e. the ga-ga, goo-goo, bla-bla phase of growing up have been buying the iPad3 in droves claiming that the quicker their tiny, nearly new-born "Golden Delicious's" get to grips with the cyber world the better.

The only problem is the damn thing is much too heavy and breast-feeding babies prefer either sucking on mummies tits or throwing their rattles out of the pram. Many dads, especially that breed, are eager to brainwash their offspring and are claiming that although their babies cannot even hold the thing, they already know how to slide their fingers over the shockingly brilliant, colourful new touch screens. Some claim even that their babies can already send E mails, look at pornos, read The Spoof, twitter, Facebook and even download their favourite tunes!

Apple, obviously, are dealing with problem of their new toy and have promised to get to the "core" of the problem as soon as possible because they want every baby on the planet up and running a.s.a.p!

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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