Written by Lyndon
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Monday, 20 February 2012

image for Why are there no volcanos on the moon? Better question: who gives a crap?
And if a volcano were to erupt on the moon, you could count those giving a shit on one hand.

HARFOLD, Vt. - Several students at Harfold State College reacted in anger at the news released this week by NASA that there could never be volcanoes on the Moon.

"Who gives a shit?" asked Philip Alders, a junior majoring in automotive history. "It's the fucking Moon."

Scientists spent in inordinate amount of time using X-ray beams to zap tiny Moon rock samples to suss out the density of liquid magma.

"Seems we could be spending the government's money finding a cure for the bird flu or something," said Flo Rence, elementary ed major and cafeteria worker. "Nope. Instead we're worrying about magma on the Moon."

Students were particularly enraged about NASA's statement that there may even be upside-down volcanoes in the Moon.

"Last I checked," said Alders, "I don't remember John Glenn journeying to the center of the Moon. Who makes this shit up and how much money do they earn?

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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