Written by P.M. Wortham
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Wednesday, 9 November 2011

image for Modern Warfare 3 Hidden Dangerfield Weapon Found
The Dangerfield cloud seen turning white after finishing its destruction.

Following yesterday's revelation that four super weapon "cheats" were embedded in MW3 around the streets of New York, the oddest weapon, a toxic gaseous ghost of Rodney Dangerfield was reportedly located late last night.

Found by two gamers working together in different cities, the Dangerfield weapon allows the soldier to command the ghost to infiltrate enemy sleeping quarters and command centers to drop clouds of toxic green gas. Mixed with the sound effects of wet flatulent, the Dangerfield even departs the deadly scene with one-liners at the ready including, "Did somebody step on a duck?" and "I bet if you buy a hat like that you get a free bowl of soup".

"He is wicked awesome", says Danny O'Bannon from Boston who found the abandoned comedy club where Dangerfield's ghost was hidden. A second gamer in Detroit figured out how to activate the ghost. Buried deep within So-Ho, the club's front signage was mostly missing except for an old poster seen inside the front glass featuring a Dangerfield appearance back in 1987. If the gamer walks into the women's bathroom and opens the center stall, the Dangerfield ghost is found seated and surprised. "See what I mean? No respect at all", replies the character. "Give me a second Sabu, I'll be right wit ya".

After that, the Dangerfield weapon stands available for toxic flatulent deployment on command, though the gamer will need to allow the ghost to refuel on cabbage, onions, corned beef and beer at one of New York's local delicatessens after each bombing.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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