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Funny story: 13 Things Never to Say in a Masonic Lodge

13 Things Never to Say in a Masonic Lodge

1. I'm signing nothing! 2. George Brown, George W. Bush and his dad as well as Henry Kissinger, Barack Obama and J.K. Rowling are all tools, all phonies. 3. Hiram Abiff is an idiotic myth and you should all grow up. 4. Your controllers of the 'upper degrees' are laughing their asses off at the gullibles clinging to the lower rungs. Right? 5. Money is not God. 6. Sex is of no real importance...
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Funny story: Letter to Santa

Letter to Santa

Dear Santa, You heartless bringer of pedophiliac child-molesting buggery with your 'chimney' indeed! Who are you trying to kid!? You are the wolf in the "Little Red Riding Hood" fable taking advantage of the young like your female counterpart of the 'Wicked Witch' of the "Sleeping Beauty" yarn. We are onto you dude! Why don't you take your mountains of mone...
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Funny story: THE FLY... Werner Fassbinder's Masterpiece?

THE FLY... Werner Fassbinder's Masterpiece?

Our film critic from U-R-FKD magazine flew to lake Geneva in Switizerland to interview legendary film producer, writer, actor and director Werner Fassbinder about his soon to be released film "The Fly". They met at his mansion overlooking the lake. Werner lounged on a deck chair by the pool and stared at the sky. He spoke slowly as is his wont and with great gravitas. Here is a transcript. Q: S...
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Funny story: Humphrey Bogart's Strange Encounter

Humphrey Bogart's Strange Encounter

It is alleged that the late movie icon Humphrey Bogart shot some of the scenes in the movie Casablanca in a state of inebriation. Most notable among them is the famous night-time drunken scene as he waits for his sweetheart Ilsa (Ingrid Bergman) to show up. The actor decided to drink heavy for that scene to give it authenticity. He passed out later on after the shot. The camera crew and direct...
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Funny story: Hitler to Goebbels Letter Found

Hitler to Goebbels Letter Found

Road diggers near the site of the Reichstag building in Berlin have found what appears to be a letter from Adolf Hitler to Joseph Goebbels his Propaganda Minister dated June 1939. It reads... "Dear Joe, Thanks for the latest films and radio broadcasts. Great stuff. Especially the rallies. Nothing like heebie-jeebie spectacle... drums, flags and the darkness of night to get the German...
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Funny story: Migrant to Northern Ireland Laments his Choice

Migrant to Northern Ireland Laments his Choice

Migrant to Belfast, Shan Mahnoor speaks out. "I cannot understand the politics of this country. Sinn Fein rule... They are the bloody Mafia... Has nobody here heard of Adolf Hitler? Even beggars in the streets of Calcutta know of Adolf Hitler... but here they have their rights taken off them,... off them I say!... and they do not even notice... and not a word about it in their newspapers.
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Funny story: Mick Flynn Confronts The New World 'Order'

Mick Flynn Confronts The New World 'Order'

This story is not entirely made up. The encounter with the teller is based on fact. A man goes into his bank in Donegal Ireland to deposit 1,000 euros, most of what he had earned that month. Here follows the conversation he had that fateful Monday morning with the girl teller. As he reaches the window she studies his face for a few seconds, dismounts from her stool and seems to be searc...
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Funny story: Terrorist Film All the Rage

Terrorist Film All the Rage

The documentary was released last week. Michael Moore calls it a "masterpiece". Sean Penn stars as ex-military specialist Commander Harry Bumsfelt who has won so many combat medals in Iraq that he will only appear with them in public if aided by a hoist. For years he campaigned and lectured for peace and armaments control in a threatened world but, now retired and running a small cigarette fact...
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Funny story: How to Solve the World's Problems

How to Solve the World's Problems

A world order is not a bad idea. What is bad about it is WHO intends to run it and HOW and what will become of us all if they get their way. So, ending that is the first step to establishing the unity of Mankind. How? Here's what we do. We end the ruling bloodlines, the malevolent dynasties, the black heart of capitalism. We do this by closing down all the banks and putting on trial all those r...
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Funny story: The Tavistock Institute's Parental Guidance Report

The Tavistock Institute's Parental Guidance Report

LONDON: The Tavistock Mind Control Institute and intellectual wing of the NWO has issued a "comprehensive report" to be distributed to all parental associations and school administrations. "It is perfectly clear to us, based on five years of extensive and rigorous research, " said Director Sir Oddball Pike, "that parents are simply not doing their job. This guideline is to help them and, if fol...
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Funny story: The New World Order Defined

The New World Order Defined

You, the individual, will be on your own. Totally. What you know will only be what we allow you to know. You will be responsible to US for all you say and do. If we do not approve of what you say or do, we will punish you. You will never question us. You will never raise your voice to us. We control the controllers. We parent your parents. We, the global government will not serve you. YOU...
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Funny story: BBC History Channel. New War Series.

BBC History Channel. New War Series.

For this winter, the BBC have lined up a twelve part series of new documentaries on warfare. Here is the list. (1) Tank Heroes of World War 11. (2) Lancaster Bomber air crews. Unsung Heroes of Dresden. (3) How Methane gas helped the Allies in World War 1. (4) Napalm Heroes of the Vietnam War. (5) Famous Torturers of World War 11.. (6) Scientific Heroes of Nuclear Fission. (7) Enola Gay...
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Funny story: Brexit. The Legal Implications

Brexit. The Legal Implications

Retired Old Bailey judge, Sir Clement Hostage has been legal advisor to Ted Heath and Tony Blair and is an expert in English Law. Now in his mid-seventies he looks all over the much traveled aristocrat of yore with ruddy complexion, bloated girth and ragged white hair. Our business reporter from U-R-FKD Magazine decided to pay him a visit to learn of his reaction to the current political mess...
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Funny story: Prof. Stephen Hawking on Black Holes

Prof. Stephen Hawking on Black Holes

Our science reporter from U-R-FKD magazine found Prof. Hawking in his study, hard at work at his computer. Our reporter, Toto Bohr, asked him some searching questions. Dr. Toto is no amateur in the field of scientific exploration. He is the man who invented the aquatic mousetrap, currently selling well in Malaysia. Hawking replied in his usual Dalek accent for which he is famous. B. So what...
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Funny story: Lost Letter of the The French Revolution Find

Lost Letter of the The French Revolution Find

A major historical find in the cellars of the British Museum has thrown new light on the reign of terror that gripped France just prior to the rise of the cardsharp, midget and Freemason called Napoleon Bonaparte. Historians consider the French Revolution one of the most important events in history, second only to the invention of canned baked beans. It ushered in the period of Enlightenment a...
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Funny story: Interview with Two of the Century's Greatest 'Artists'

Interview with Two of the Century's Greatest 'Artists'

Jeff Koons and Damien Hirst, two of the most expensive artists living today, joined forces for an exhibition of Koons' work at Hirst's Newport Street Gallery in London. Titled "Now," the exhibition displays over 30 pieces of art by the American artist, all of which were borrowed from Hirst's personal collection. Critics are all in a tizzy over the event. We sent our cultural editor from "U-R-FK...
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Funny story: How do We Improve Our Prisons?

How do We Improve Our Prisons?

"UK Prison Reform. A serious issue that needs to be taken seriously." (BBC London. 19/05/2016) Some suggestions. 1. Daily full body massages. 2. Freely available prostitutes. 3. Boxing stadiums. 4. Regular visiting entertainers like Rolf Harris or Boris Johnson. 5. Comprehensive menu prepared by Gordon Ramsay. 6. Wine, spirits and beer available with all meals. 7. Prescr...
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Funny story: The Transcendental Gambling Cult

The Transcendental Gambling Cult

Investors on Wall Street are turning in droves to a new cult that is sweeping America. Spokesman for Scientology Tom Cruise has said it should be banned outright. Officials of the Sri Swami Winner's cult called "Scientific Amerology" deny that it is a cult. They say it is a "natural philosophy" of the New Age that was incubated during the the 1960s Flower Power Movement in Los Angeles and has...
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Funny story: New Board Game called "BANKER" Sweeping the World

New Board Game called "BANKER" Sweeping the World

The object of the game is to fleece as many people as possible in the shortest possible time, build a dynasty and get to die in your bed before you are assassinated. Although you may be responsible for thousands if not millions of deaths you cannot personally kill anybody. If your dice throws run against you whereupon you must kill your adversary by your own hand you lose the game. "Lifetime Po...
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Funny story: The Falsification of Consciousness

The Falsification of Consciousness

What does it mean? Means lying to your face. But more than that it means lying to a lot of people often enough until they assume the lie is truth. This is the modus operandi of the New World Order using all the powers of their media and political organs to do so. Brainwashing in a word. They have the Catholic Church and the Nazi sheeple programming strategies to tell them how it is done. Edward...
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Funny story: BBC Training Manual Leaked

BBC Training Manual Leaked

A whistleblower has released an excerpt from a training manual used by the BBC to train 'News' broadcasters. Headed the "TEN KEY POINTS FOR ALL BROADCASTERS" it makes for disturbing reading. It reads as follows: 1: Never ever question what you, the newscaster, are expected to read. If you do, you question your employer, the BBC. And that can get you into trouble. Ask David Icke. Think of yourse...
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Funny story: BBC World News April 2016

BBC World News April 2016

BARBARA: "Following the doctors' strike a man in Croydon had to have his leg removed when an ingrowing toenail turned septic. After receiving an epidural, a woman in Epping gave birth to deformed triplets. In Madrid, a man was shot dead during a botched supermarket robbery. While in Riga Latvia, a woman making an emergency phone call concerning the accidental death of her Pooch had her bag s...
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Showing page 1 (of 9 pages)

Breaking News...

Alabama's New State Motto

After Tuesday Alabama's state motto, Audemus jura nostra defendere ("We dare defend our rights"), will most likely be changed to Audemus pedophilium nostra defendere ("We dare defend our pedophiles").
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