Written by armfeetandtoe
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Friday, 8 July 2011

image for Armfeetandtoe Interviews News of the World Germaine Gearbox shows where she hides her scanner

I agreed to meet Gemaine Gearbox, Senior Political Editor, in a secret location at 33 Ribald Road East Finchley. When I arrived, I gave the coded knock that would ensure she would open the door.
An hour later, no answer, so I threw a brick through the window.

The front door opened, and I was ushered in, why she had a cinema employee opening the door, nobody knew. I was shown into the lounge, then the kitchen, bathroom, bedroom, and garden. I told the Estate Agent I was not here to buy the house. I found Germaine in the conservatory, sitting in a large plant pot. " The toilet is broken" she strained. Her ablution over, we sat down to talk.

I asked the leading question. "Why did your newspaper, hack peoples phones and use that personal private information to sell copy"?

"We did not hack peoples phones! Honest! We like people"

I pressed harder, "Yeah, Yeah, wotever"!

"Okay, we might have used people with huge ears to listen in on conversations, but we did not hack phones"

I asked why she had a scanner with her.

"You never know who might be walking past"

"So your saying, your newspaper never hacked phones, and used that information to create headlines"

"No"

"What you doing later"? I asked cunningly.

"Editing a phone conversation between David Cameron and the manager of the local McDonalds resturant"

"Really! What's he saying"?

"Davids complaing about his McFlurry"

"Wow! there good those scanners, where can I get one"?

Germaine gave me the address of her underground scanner supplier, I will be investigating Mr Dixon and his seedy business in the future.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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