Written by Gordon Clarke
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Friday, 10 June 2011

In the next series of Extreme Fishing, jovial geordie actor Robson Green, will be returning to his native north east to fish in the River Wear.

I intend to catch the Lambton Worm. The original worm was caught by John Lambton back in the 12th century but I believe it's descendants still live in the Wear.

Even though it hasn't been seen for years, thanks to John Lambton's description, I know exactly what it looks like.

It's got geet big teeth, geet big gob and geet big goggly eyes.

For bait I will be using calves and lambs and sheep. If that doesn't catch the worm, as a last resort I will try little bairns.

I know that sounds a bit extreme but the program is called Extreme Fishing.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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