Written by K.C. Bell
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Sunday, 31 December 2006

image for Bush In Job Switch All aboard!

Hollywood, D.C. - If President Bush worked driving bus for Greyhound, and was suppose to take a load of passengers to Las Vegas, but ended up in Disneyland, gave it a second try, and drove to Salt Lake City, then on the third attempt, landed in Aspen, Colorado, chances are he'd lose his job. If he defended his driving and map reading skills by suggesting he send a team of wise men to Las Vegas to evaluate where he took the wrong turn, he'd still be out of a job.

"So what's wrong with Disneyland, Salt Lake City or Aspen?" would sound like an unreasonable question.

Conversely, if a Greyhound bus driver, by some cosmic scrambled egg accident, were catapulted into the White House after being elected President of the United States, and while cutting shrub on the job, two U. S. aircraft carriers were torpedoed and sunk by terrorists; terrorists who were citizens of Denmark, but trained in Norway; and in retaliation the President decided to invade Spain, and got mired in a Franco type civil war with insurgents jetting in from around the world to fight the outnumbered coalition of the willing, and the bus driver planned to send a surge of twenty thousand more U. S. troops into the battle:

"So what's wrong with Disneyland, Salt Lake City or Aspen?" sounds like a reasonable question after all.

But suppose President Bush hadn't gone into politics or driving bus for Greyhound, and instead went to work in the movies? With his Yale experience as a cheer leader, a career in films seems natural. He could easily play the Indiana Jones character given to Harrison Ford or the Hidalgo type role performed by Viggo Mortensen; nothing complicated like John Trovolta's dancing in Saturday Night Fever or tongue twisting Shakespeare. In the right lighting, (shaded) the President could resemble Paul Newman, and the whole Iraq entanglement, Joe Wilson and the outing of a C.I.A. agent, and partisan politics in Congress would never have happened.

We would still have Mel Gibson using the J word, and Michael Richards using the N word, and Rosie O'Donnell calling Donald Trump the P word, and Trump calling Rosie the P.F. word, but what a far, far better world it would have been had George pursued a career in films.

Happy Brave New Year!

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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