Written by Auntie Matter
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Tuesday, 24 May 2011

Here is an interview with Chief Superintendent Hamish McSporrin leading the recently re-opened investigation of the Maddie McCann case by Scotland Yard. In line for a knighthood some say, Mr.Sporrin, a graduate of Edinburgh University, was once a director of MI5. The investigation was launched by Prime Minister David Cameron.

Q: The British public are of course paying for this investigation so what degree of transparency can they expect?

A: Total.

Q: You mean all findings will be released to the press?

A: Absolutely.

Q: Even if they involve local politicians who might possibly be involved in paedophilia rings in Europe?

A: Er.... I didn't say that.

Q: You said...

A: I know what I said! But that will be a matter for the Prime Minister and the Home Office.

Q: We are talking limited transparency then...? That's a crafty phrase for cover-up, isn't it?

A: Not the words I would have chosen. Depends what we find.

Q: But isn't it your duty to bring culprits to justice? Malefactors will be arrested I presume.

A: Questioned.

Q: But not held.

A: Depends on the evidence.

Q: And if you have enough evidence?

A: It is placed in the hands of the prosecutor.

Q: Who is answerable to...?

A: The Lord Chief Justice.

Q: Who is answerable to?

A: The Prime Minister who launched the investigation.

Q: So, the Prime Minister is in charge of the whole thing,.. basically... and he will decide who is to be prosecuted and who will not. And if his friends and associates are implicated? Or perhaps even a member of the Royal Family or MI5 or MI6, they will all be brought to justice, will they?

A: Not for me to say.

Q: This could be some sort of a game then to keep people in the dark about paedophilia and who the people really are who are involved in it? Where does justice come in?

A: I have a dental appointment.

Q: Can you just answer one more question? Why did Gordon Brown close down the investigation by Portuguese Police in 2008? Might it have anything to do with his friend, Portuguese ex-Prime Minister José Barruso and now EEC president who himself is an alleged paedophile?

A: Not for me to say.

Q: Is Gordon Brown a paedophile? He has been accused of it on the internet by David Icke and others and he has made no response to his accusers. Surely, he has a very strong case for defamation. Don't you agree?

A: I know nothing about that.

Q: What about paedophilia in Scotland where you come from? One article I read recently has cited Edinburgh as the paedophile capital of Europe.

A: There is no paedophilia in Scotland.

Q: How can you be so sure?

A: We have no evidence for it.

Q: Therefore it doesn't exist.

A: I have a plane to catch for Lisbon. Sorry, I couldn't have been of more help.

So ended the interview. Superintendent McSporrin later released a statement saying that he would be giving no more interviews until after the case is closed. It remains to be seen what sort of press coverage this investigation will get as the weeks and months roll by. Or will it simply peter out like its predecessors for reasons that we, who have put people in power to guard over our affairs, our well-being, and that of our children, are never allowed to know?

The particular abhorrence the British public feel for this sort of crime may ensure for once that their democratic rights are respected. We are all equal under the law.......aren't we?

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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