I love people, I love meeting people, I love talking to people and I love listening to people, I love hearing about the absurdities that make up all our lives. I love the colourful tapestry of a good story rather then the dullness of the truth. However, from time to time there are things people say that really put me off. Here are a few
"I'm very honest; I'll always tell you what I'm thinking" What I want to know is why? What makes you think I want to know what you're thinking? Are you my bank manager or my doctor? No, so why would you presume that I would want an honest appraisal of your thoughts. Unbridled honesty is for the feeble minded or those without creativity. That's why you find a lot of dull people opt for institutionalised religion or the civil service. An assumption that I want to know what you're thinking indicates that you have a god complex and think you are the messiah. After all the truth and thoughts are very personal, subjective states and therefore should be kept to yourself and only shared in extreme circumstances. I only want to know what you think if you think I'm great.
"I always tell it like it is" Once again this compulsion indicates that you have no imagination or are lazy. Why do you want to tell it like it is? I don't want to know how it is. I want to know the beauty of how it could be or how it was. I want you to verbally paint me a colourful spectrum of beautiful lies…unless you're my accountant in which case I don't want you to say a word.
"I always say what I mean" This is probably a good choice. As not saying what you mean would indicate that you were inarticulate or stupid. It may also mean that you are speaking a foreign language that you are not really proficient in.
"I'm a plain speaker" You have my deepest sympathy. What a sad and empty life you must lead.
"I'm being real" Good being real is a good place to start. It just worry's me that you feel the need to state your realness. Did you think I mistook you for an elf, a fairy or a mythical being? If you ware not real what would you be? Did you ever think of that?
"I can only be myself" Unless you are someone else.
"I'll always be myself" Unless you are someone else or have a multiple personality disorder. In which case nice to meet you all. You must call round for a drink and a chat some night. We can have a fun evening exchanging with each other how the world really is, what we really think in a very real plain way.