Written by Mr Goster
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Saturday, 5 March 2011

image for Mr Sheen Shines Mr Sheen Shines

US Heartthrob and actor Charlie Sheen has launched a brand new cleaning product which he hopes will help him 'clean up.'

The troubled star of 'Two And A Half Men' spoke to a packed Press Conference today.


I'm sick and tired of making headlines for all the wrong reasons and have decided to clean up my act in every way. I'm a handsome guy and very talented sure, but eventually, you have to sit down and ask yourself, is that all I've got?

Thankfully, the answer is no. It's not all I've got. I've invented a fabulous spray polish that cleans any surface. Wood, vinyls, glass, Ceramics, you name it, Mr. Sheen cleans it. I knew the product was great, but we needed a real test, so I contacted my great friend Sean Penn about my idea. We went to Haiti, which as you know was devastated last year by Earthquakes, and gave Aid workers my product. They sprayed it on all manner of surfaces and buffed it up and they came up good as new. We'll have Haiti back to normal in next to no time.

We're going to call it Mr Sheen and the tag line will say that it shines any surface. I've even invented a little character to advertise the product. He's a little man in an Aeroplane flying around and spraying all the different surfaces to get them clean.

I'm so proud of myself. Sean thinks I'm a genius. I am really I suppose.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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