Written by K.C. Bell
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Friday, 25 February 2011

image for Governor Scott Walker Of Wisconsin To Step Down

Governor Scott Walker of Wisconsin has announced that for the good of the state, he is stepping down to spend more time with his family.

The nation's attorney general (there's one?) may also be about to make an announcement. He is investigating whether to pursue criminal charges against the Governor on conspiracy with other Republican governors to destroy the rights of public employee.

Evidence? The thirty minute prank telephone call accepted by the governor from someone impersonating Walker's largest financial contributor known as Mr. Big Bucks. Big Bucks and the governor discussed strategy for destroying the unions, employing goons to infiltrate the protesters, and that other Republican governors were joining in on the same "team" effort.

According to Wikipedia, Walker dropped out of college with a C average; better than the C- average of George W. Bush. The real Mr. Big Bucks is Mr. Koch who owns a $43 billion energy company and supplies coal to the power plants in Wisconsin. The Governor had his Republican majority pass a late night vote on the no-bid sale of state owned power plants. Walker insists there's no connection between the sale of the 32 power plants and his largest financial contributer.

About this time, the Governor received a telephone call from Muammar Gaddafi.

"What does he want?"

"He's on your side, Governor. He wants to give you a thumbs up message for sticking it to the protesters."

During the telephone call with Big Bucks, the governor compared himself to Ronald Reagan and the collapse of the Soviet Union. "When Reagan fired the air traffic controllers, they said: This guy is tough. He means business. Boys, collapse the Soviet Union. We lose." Or something like that. Walker added that his actions would destroy collective bargaining and the Democratic base. "I'm the first domino."

With the state capital filled with chanting protesters and Republicans in turmoil, the governor was told that President Obama was on the phone.

"Oh, yeah? What does he want."

"He wants to thank you. Give you a thumbs up message for screwing up the Republican party and giving him a free pass to the White House in 2012."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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