Written by Inchcock
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Sunday, 6 February 2011

image for Unintentionally Humerous Newspaper Headlines - 2 Typos, Accidental Headlines

Some are just slips of the tongue:

Grandmother of eight makes hole in one

Deaf mute gets new hearing in killing

Police begin campaign to run down jaywalkers

House passes gas tax onto senate

Stiff opposition expected to casketless funeral plan

Two convicts evade noose, jury hung

William Kelly was fed secretary

Milk drinkers are turning to powder

Safety experts say school bus passengers should be belted

Quarter of a million Chinese live on water

Farmer bill dies in house

Iraqi head seeks arms


Some become unintentionally suggestive:

Queen Mary having bottom scraped

Is there a ring of debris around Uranus?

Prostitutes appeal to Pope

Panda mating fails - veterinarian takes over

Child's stool great for use in garden

Dr. Ruth to talk about sex with newspaper editors

Soviet virgin lands short of goal again

Organ festival ends in smashing climax


Grammar often botches other headlines:

Eye drops off shelf

Squad helps dog bite victim

Dealers will hear car talk at noon

Enraged cow injures farmer with ax

Lawmen from Mexico barbecue guests

Miners refuse to work after death

Two Soviet ships collide - one dies

Two sisters reunite after eighteen years at checkout counter


Once in a while, a botched headline takes on a meaning opposite from the one intended:

Never withhold herpes from loved one

Nicaragua sets goal to wipe out literacy

Drunk drivers paid $1,000 in 1984

Autos killing 110 a day, let's resolve to do better


Sometimes newspaper editors state the obvious:

If strike isn't settled quickly it may last a while

War dims hope for peace

Smokers are productive, but death cuts efficiency

Cold wave linked to temperatures

Child's death ruins couple's holiday

Blind woman gets new kidney from dad she hasn't seen in years

Man is fatally slain

Something went wrong in jet crash, experts say

Death causes loneliness, feeling of isolation

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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