Written by j.w.
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Tags: Tree

Friday, 4 February 2011

image for Can You Live in a Tree? So - Who Lives in a House Like This?

The question everyone is asking those in favour of forests is : Can you live in a tree?

Monkeys can but humans have problems. Therefore sell off the forests, cut the trees down and build houses - making a considerable profit in the process for the developers.

A new scheme has been established, after extensive research among trees. They say they convert carbon dioxide into oxygen but this process can be carried out by robots with the latest incredible invention. This does the same as trees, but without falling leaves to clog up the drains!

So we can dispose of forests to the highest bidder, build houses with the felled trees and lower the rate of income tax for the few wealthy people who actually pay it!

The brilliance of this idea may not win over one or two ramblers, but they can ramble elsewhere - across moorland for instance. In any case who has the time to ramble? If it is exercise you want go to a gym.

Thus we see England's 'green and pleasant land' transformed into a meaningful association of physical and social amenities.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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