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Saturday, 22 January 2011

image for How I got the job as Communications Director at no 10 Jim Womble's Humble Start in Life

Following my appointment as the new Communications Director at no 10 I am initiating a new out-front policy approved by the Prime Minister.

This will be an open frank department and it is in this spirit that I release the transcript of some sections of my interview that got me the job, before Wikileaks gets hold of it.

INTERVIEW RECORDING

Q Why do you want the job Womble?

A De money.

Murmurs of approval.

Q What experience do you have of the media?

A I write hilarious articles for the Spoof.

General sounds of approval

Q We could do with a few laughs around here. Now Womble tell me about your family.

A We come from Wimbledon Common. My father was someone who built himself up from nowhere. I went to the local comprehensive and started to write. After several media experiences I got my present job with Spoof against thousands of other applicants.

Murmurs of approval - 'Good working class background'.

Q So Womble - may I call you Jim?

A Of course David.

Chorus Jim Womble, Jim Womble of Wimbledon Common!

Q It runs nicely off the tongue. Now Jim, tell us about your plans for the Office.

A I shall try and portray you and your Government in the best possible light - it says here.

Laughter

Q We're beginning to like you. So why are you a Tory?

A I heard this job was vacant.

Q I like your honesty, Jim Womble. When can you start?

A When Ossie's hacking pal Cookson leaves to write books like his mother.

More laughter

So starting on Monday a new era dawns as the Womble of Wimbledon comes to the rescue of a failing programme and breaths new life into its advertising revenue.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!
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