Written by Charpa93
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Sunday, 9 January 2011

image for Old Boomer Hit Parade: Aged Man I am an Aged Man

Back by popular demand, here is yet another great oldie to add to your collection. While most of us know the tune to the Kinks' "Apeman" song, I am linking it here to help you fit my words to the melody, with a slight variation.

Kinks' "Apeman"

Aged Man
(Sung to the Kinks' "Apeman"

I know I am growing older cause my hair is getting gray like
an octogenarian.

But I'm hanging onto youth long as I can get around,
I'm still considered a hip man.

I don't have my own teeth in my mouth no more,
Every friggin joint in my body is sore,
Pretty soon my balls will be draggin the floor,
Cause I am an aged man.

I'm an aged man, I'm an aged, aged man, oh I'm an aged man. I'm a Geritol man, a Viagra man, yes I'm an aged man.

I now get my drugs through medicare,
My kidneys are failing, I might need a spare,
I can't bathe myself but what do I care?
I am an aged man.

My eyesight is waning, my liver's almost shot, and
my skin's like a crocodile's.

They've replaced both of my knees, and I always have to pee,
But, I'm okay in general.

I don't feel as well as I used to feel,
I'm having a hard time eating a full meal,
But what can I say, it's not that big a deal,
Cause I am an aged man.

I'm an aged man, I'm an aged, aged man, oh I'm an aged man. I'm a Geritol man, a Viagra man, yes I'm an aged man.

I can't get it up without taking a pill,
My kids are asking me if I've updated my will,
Everyone tells me that I'm over the hill,
Yes I am an aged man.

I'm an aged man, I'm an aged, aged man, oh I'm an aged man. I'm a Geritol man, a Viagra man, yes I'm an octogenarian.
I'm and aged man, I'm an aged, aged man, yes I'm an aged man.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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