Written by Charpa93
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Monday, 20 December 2010

image for The Three Wise Men of the Spoof See no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil

The story of the Three Wise Men is told every Christmas holiday season but no one is really certain that the story has any basis in reality. This makes such a story ripe for a satirical slant. Therefore, without further adieu, I bring you "The Three Wise Men of the Spoof."

And it is told that in ancient times (or at least back in 2003) there was and had been a young man who believed in nothing more than a hearty laugh and had so then developed a place on which others like himself could thenceforth record their musings. And so it was.

And it came to pass that on the seventh day in the month of the seventh rising of the moon in the year of our Lord 2004, a writer known as Abel Rodriguez posted his first of a long list of stories about wondrous things to behold and to which he attached his name, and it was on this day that he came to be known as writer Abel Rodriguez and it was good.

And as the moon rose and set many more times, it came to pass that two other writers of equal yearning came to the Spoof in search of a place in which to ponder life in such a way as to lead other writers in the direction of a suitable yet unrecompensed hobby, and their names were Skoob and Bureau, and it was also very good.

Now, in the days of the Spoof of 2004, there were nary as many writers as in present times but all were touched by the greatness of the first wise spoofer, known to all as Abel. And in those days this great writer was indeed fortunate for there was no writer named Cain to smite him or his wondrous tales. And so it was with mercy that Abel has become a constant reminder of the goodness from which a life of spoof could be had by all if all would abide by the rules of the forum.

And so, in the beginning, the forum was good but it was nary used in the way for which it was intended. Until a wondrous thunder did rain down upon the forums and in its wake there appeared Skoob, the second wise man, who had been given the gift of ponderous gab (especially upon the drinking of the hops and malt beverage of his liking) and then did he begin to post often to assure the continuity of the forum and then did he becometh the light and the way, and it shone round about them. Blessed be the angel of the spoof, sayeth the Fergus (who may some day knoweth the bliss of becoming featured writer).

And in the same days as the Skoob, there did appear a third wise man known to all as Bureau, who was a man of few words but hefty words nonetheless and who laid down a brand with his snip and his pets and he was sorely beloved among those who also wrote the abbreviated spoof and whose words were rarely ignored by the great Bureau so as to receive the highest of compliments, and none were higher than his. And the stars shone round about them and they saw this and were pleased.

And in the days and lo the many nights of the Spoof, the forums became as they were, and it was good. But alas, terrible musings appeared upon the writings known as threads of the spoof and the writers were sore afraid. As many more spoofers came to a life of spoof, it became necessary to renew the vows of the forum for the tribe of the newbies and it was sore becoming burdensome for the three wise men of the Spoof.

With a darkening swift might of the pen came blasphemous musings which saddened the three wise men and it was then and often that they admonished the others with this message:

"Lo, fellow writers, be not afraid of saying what ye wanteth to say as long as those words ye write
are nary a slam against another writer. Say only what ye would have said unto ye (or you if American). And always keepeth it real."

And the light shone round about them, and to this day, the wise men do not sit in judgment but remain as beacons to the many writers who find their way to the Spoof to use as they will until the end of time so saith us all. Hallelujah (the Leonard Cohen version.)

Amen.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!
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