Written by C. Cranium
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Monday, 6 December 2010

image for Retire Now, Work Later Ski instead of working

Company has answer to backwards dilemma: What is retirement and why does it have to come at the end of your career and life?

Why not retire when you are 21 and able to enjoy your full potential? Work can wait, but your youth and health are on a declining scale.

Waiting until you are 65 is like waiting until the expiration date has passed. Milk may still be palatable after its expiry date but its near sour. That is okay but isn't fresh better.

You have lost your freshness at 65 and the clock is ticking. There won't be any bungee jumping, or surfing after society and big business has sucked out your best years for the sake of countless meetings and emails.

No, the societal plan is to use you for its purposes until your expiry date.

The reward at 65 is that you are a basket case and life has pretty much ringed you dry.

Top-secret HR master plans are to sequester youths in cubicles and assign them tasks that only they can understand and do at Xbox lighting speed.

The sequestered minions advance through the ever-changing business world naively believing that they have achieved meaningful life experience while getting paid. Are these individuals happy? If not there are other choices. You are at your prime in your twenties, so why not live a meaningful life then work when you are 50.

Todd's Extreme Sports Testing and Industrial Certification Ltd., (TESTICL) has taken a different approach to a careers by paying for you to play with the promise of a job later. There are numerous play for pay opportunities in most sporting and outdoor activity areas.

TESTICL has contracts with many large sporting goods manufactures and can give the right person a snow board, a paycheck, and unlimited lift fees to test the product for years, with a for sure job waiting at corporate.

Opportunities are available in many areas: bowling, scuba diving, parasailing, arctic tents and equipment, hunting, fishing, etc. Contact for more information at: www.toddstesticls.web.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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