Written by twylo2000
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Thursday, 14 October 2010

image for Texas Governor Perry Releases Campaign Schedule In the event that "horny toads" become extinct before election day, the Governor will gig a frog.

The Committee for the Reelection of Perry (CREEP) has released the Texas Governor's evening campaign schedule through election day. The schedule is identical daily, except on Wednesdays at 10:00 PM, when the Governor will gig a "horny toad."

7:00 PM - Put on Hat

7:15 PM - Git in Truck

7:30 PM - Hoot 'n Holler

8:00 PM - Election Talkin

9:00 PM - Threaten to Secede from the Union

9:15 PM - Go Back to Talkin Place, Git Hat

9:30 PM - Picture Takin

9:45 PM - Hoot 'n Holler

10:00 PM - Shoot Coyote

10:30 PM - Git in Truck

10:35 PM - Git out of Truck

10;40 PM - Look fer Keys

11:30 PM - Find Keys in Hand

11:35 PM - Hoot 'n Holler

11:50 PM - Git in Truck

12:00 AM - Git Fried Pie at What-a-Burger

12:20 AM - Git Home

12:25 AM - Hoot 'n Holler

Registered Republicans and pre-screened members of the press are invited to convoy with the Governor (shotgun has been called through election day). Departure is at 7:15 PM from that gas station up the road a piece.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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