Written by Ellis Ian Fields
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Saturday, 9 October 2010

image for Your Stars This Week: Libra

By our resident astrologer, Liberty Nebulae.

You are well known for being indecisive - but you must be firm. Grab opportunity by the forelock, my lovely Libra darlings.

Yes! Smack that smart-arse get at work who keeps nicking your coffee and swans around chatting up the birds - give him a right good twatting! He's been asking for it for years, hasn't he? Didn't he blame you for that cock-up over the Lazenby account? And he got that lass you were keen on up the duff.

And when they try to sack you, tell 'em where to shove their stupid job! And let your famous Libran creativity go to work when telling the stupid boss what you think of him and his plans for the "balanced scorecard efficiency protocols." Pillock!

If it's your birthday this week...

...family and friends seem expecially generous - just accept it. And expect increased levels of mail.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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