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Saturday, 17 July 2010

image for Letters to the Editor - Alien Hunters Anonymous (AHA)

Where creatures such as the chupacabra, bigfoot, and aliens are more than just sightings.

Dear Fellow Bigfoot Hunters,

I wish to comment on a story that I read recently that bigfoot sightings are on the rise in Michigan. Can anyone tell me what part of Michigan they are on the rise in? The story claims that the bigfoot creature was dining out of a dumpster. My first thought that it was dirty hippies just dumpster diving for edible food out back of the local supermarket, but the story said it was out back of a Wings and Wienies, and I know most of those dumpster-diving hippies are vegans (just as scary sometimes as a chupacabra, ha ha). Anyways, I live about a mile from a Wings and Wienies in Southampton, Michigan. Any further information would be greatly appreciated.

BTW, thanks for this awesome site. I know I can trust the things on here cause you say you are certified hunters. Thanks for taking the time to become certified. It cuts down on the fakes out there trying to make a fast buck on us faithful bigfoot hunters.

Faithful Bigfoot Hunter

Dear FBH,

The story turned out to be a false-negative for bigfoot. You were right on the money this time. It was dumpster-diving vegans scrounging for leftover carrot and celery sticks. But we'll keep you posted.

Every vigilantly yours,
Ed.

Dear AHA,

I know you get a lot of stories from crackpots who say they seen a alien but they just are making it up to get attention. Well, I wanna tell you a story that I swear is the God's honest truth and you ain't gonna believe it but here it is:

I seen a spaceship full of 8-foot tall aliens out in my back yard a couple years ago and still cain't get the image outta my mind. I hear'd a racket one night and saw some lights so I got my flashlight and went out to the back yard to check on the shed, when I realized, "hey, we ain't got no shed. It was blowed away a few years back in a tornada that ripped thru here and dang near got the house too. But there was a shed that night, a bright glowing shed with a door the size a them ones you see over at the Costco. I hid in the bushes so's not to be seen and watched as the door opened and out came 3 aliens, but I cain't tell you what happened next. I blacked out. When I came to the next day, I was back in bed and the shed was gone. I checked all around for footprints and such but weren't nothin' there.

What do you suppose it was I saw?

Spooked in Nuthatch, MI

Dear Nuthatch,

Sounds like you had a alien encounter, either that or a nightmare. Don't suppose you thought to get pictures, did ya?

Ed.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!
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