Written by j.w.
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Friday, 18 June 2010

image for Chief Executive Hayward denounced 'Have you heard of water boarding?'

The American Congress has been cross examaning the boss of Union Carbide (formerly known as United States Carbide), Chuck Hayward about the appalling accident in Bhophal, India, where thousands of people have been poisoned. Years after the accident children are being born with defects due to the accident.

'This is an attack against America' declared President Obama 'we demand a compensation package of 20 billion dollars to deal with the clean up operation and with many calls for compensation for loss of life and livelihood.'

'But the accident was not in America' pleaded Hayward 'no Americans were killed and the company is American.'

'Does this make it OK?' demanded Obama.

'No' replied the flustered Chief Executive 'life is important in any part of the world.'

'You will be excusing the slaughter in Iraq next' shouted Obama. 'You will be defending our client State of Israel killing people in international waters or the overthrow of Governments in South America. Democracy is important, Mr Hayward, anywhere in the world.'

'I am deeply distressed about what has happened' Hayward responded.

'Just because you are an American company does not excuse you. You are shirking your responsibility for your own actions.'

After 24 hours of non-stop cross examination, when Hayward had no food or water and had to stand with a blinding light shining on him, Congress had still not finished.

'Have you heard about water boarding Mr Hayward?' asked Obama.

'Yes' came the frightened reply 'that is torture'.

'We have nothing to do with such things here now. We are civilised. But we will see you dealt with in an even more rigourous way.'

At this stage former Vice President Dick Chain was introduced. 'Mr Chain will be dealing with you now, ably assisted by Vice Presidential candidate Sarah Pain'.

Hayward visibly withered and fell to the ground weeping.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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