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Tuesday, 1 June 2010

image for Final Tweets from Slain Al Qaeda Leader Mustafa Abu Yazid. Ouch. Dicks!

Al Qaeda says dead leader Mustafa Abu Yazid, its No. 3 man and commander of its operations, who was killed with his wife, and three of his daughters, was a religious (!) user of Twitter.com, and Tweeted up until his final seconds.

Yazid, an Egyptian national, is believed to be the first Al Qaeda member to use Social Networking. The Pentagon has released

translated Tweets from the dead terrorist:

10:21am: Allah be prasied, this is so f'n kewl.

10:31am: It is so f---ing hot out here... Wish I had a Fresca and 10 infidels to behead!

10:33am: J/K! I hate Fresca.

11:10am: I can hear bombs landing close by. Must stay alert.

11:11am: Does Ashton Kutcher have to tweet every thought that pops in his head.

11:13am: Sounds like military fighting their way into my cave. If I am...

11:13am: caught they will surely kill me and my family.

11:15am: Death for me may be near. OMFG!

11:17am: Never going onto chatroutelle again. PERVS!

11:22am: Al Qaeda takes responsibility for bombing American base.

11:25am: More will come. We will not falter, we will not fail. Allah Akbar.

11:33am: WTF! Lindsay looks like a skank! Nice SCRAM bracelet, ho.

11:44am: Bombing is increasing. I will not live to see the end of the day.

11:46am: Look at these bombs!! http://tinyurl.com/2D8DE1

11:50am: I am mortally wounded. I have seconds to live. Must find out who

11:55am: ...won American Idol, the dorky one or the chick with no teeth.

YAzid was killed at 11:58am.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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