Written by KendoMonkey
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Tags: cash, cattle, euro

Tuesday, 2 September 2003

image for Cash & moolah: Your friend, the lowly coin An oldish coin with a bearded lady on it

The lowly coin started life in 3000BC by Egyptian slave-monkeys who needed a way to barter for drinks that their evil overlords would deny them. Back then, the 1 pence piece was formed with cattle dung and spittle, curved into a crude circular shape.

Even now, some coins are made using dung and spittle - the 1 Euro coin is the best example.

But you shouldn't forget your good friend, the coin. In recent years the coin has been derided as a 'lower form of currency', whilst the paper-note has become the Tara-Palmer-Tomkinson of the money world.

Coins are also laughed at for being 'clunky' and heavy, weighing down the polystyrene cups of winos and beggars. But the coin is not the only form of currency that has its flaws:

Example: There's a nice crisp non-heavy £5 note in your back pocket. But you forgot it's wash-day. Oh no! Your beautiful £5 note is turned into pulp - would this have happened with a £1 coin? No. Admittedly, your washing machine might have been destroyed if the coin had come out of your pocket, but that's not the point.

Look at your desk. Or inside your pockets. Or somewhere near your heart: these are the places for coins. Love the coin.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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