A rebuttal of claims of fakeness by Frank Miller.
I'd like to put to rest the rumors negating my heroic deeds during the Mumbai terrorist attacks last year.
During the ordeal, I rescued over 250 people by making rope (allowing them to climb to safety) made from spunk; spun to make silk.
It makes remarkably strong rope when woven together. That's no easy trick! Do you know how much wanking is needed to make that much spunk? I was red raw! I was on a 100 percent protein diet for three months to recover, Jesus, I'm not superman!
I rescued 256 people from the carnage thanks to my wanking and the derogatory stories claiming that I've never even been to Mumbai are totally false.
I ask these doubters to provide concrete evidence of their 'facts' or just fuck off and let me bask in the glory of being a fucking hero.
Who else in the world can say they rescued over 250 people from death with his own spunk?