Written by Monkey Woods
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Saturday, 2 January 2010

image for My New Life As A Woman What I look like now

My secret is out,
I'm no longer a man,
I came to Thailand,
Instead of Japan,
And all of a sudden,
As I daydreamed one day,
I had queer cravings,
I thought I was gay!
Went straight down to Yanhee,
Told the doctors down there,
"I'm fed up being macho
Remove my cock hair!"

But, oh! The translator!
He was such a fool!
Not only the cock hair,
But also my tool,
Was hacked of with gusto,
And now I'm a tart,
It hurts when I dump,
(Even more when I fart),
But not being a moaner,
I've accepted my lot,
And now I'm called Gracie,
Ingrid or Dot,
And lo! I have boyfriends,
Dozens of poofs!
Who play with my pussy,
As I bang out the spoofs.
You know, it's not that bad,
Being a female,
Although I do still miss,
My big, gangly tail (7 inches slack)

Woods 2009

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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