I was right all along. Our President's surprising receipt of the 2009 Nobel Peace Prize WAS a conpsiracy. And I am the first to be able to publish all the details. Read on...
1) Norway and Denmark are both part of Scandinavia, also know as 'the Nordic Countries.' Obama rhymes with Scandinavia, and Barack rhymes with Nordic. Sort of. Hey, it's my conspiracy theory!
2) Vikings were Norse (Scandinavian) explorers and pirates, who were also the first Europeans to create a settlement in North America. In Newfoundland. Oh. That's Canada. Hmm. Ok. Wait a minute. Got it. Who play ice hockey. As do the Scandinavians. As do the Chicago Blackhawks.
3) Minnesota kitty corners Illinois, home to Chicago. The NFL team of Minnesota is…the Vikings. And the NFL team for Chicago is…the Bears. And the Danish Royal Coat of Arms features. Hang on. I can find a lion. An elephant. What's that down there? Yup. A Bear.
4) Scandinavia is famous for furniture. As is Minnesota. Which sells its furniture in Chicago. The NBA team for Minnesota is the Timberwolves. And what do you find in Scandinavia? You got it. Timber and wolves. From which they make the furniture. Well, not the wolves. Ok. I'm losing my place here.
5) Sweden (another part of Scandinavia, next door to Norway) is famous for blond beauties, particularly those that are naked. The harbour of Copenhagen, in Denmark, features a statue of a naked mermaid. Hugh Hefner was born in Chicago. AND. Heff openly supported Obama for The Presidency.
Game, set and match. Conspiracy revealed. When Copenhagen couldn't swing the Olympics for its blood brother, Obama, Norway stepped up to the plate, and gave him the Nobel Peace Prize instead. Eat your heart out, Oliver Stone. There's a new Conspiracy Sheriff in town.
"That's the way…uh huh, uh huh…I like it…uh huh, uh huh…that's the way…uh huh, uh huh…I like it"!