Dear Prime Minister
Following your recent "success" as a "Fantastic And Inspirational Leader" I'm going to discuss how bringing back the death penalty will be just as "successful" as the BNP leader Nick Griffin trying to get the public vote by wearing a mankini to work.
If we had the death penalty the whole of the uk would have a life expectancy of around 5 minutes if they are lucky enough and it would become a complete and utter walking disaster. We would be sentanced to death for something as minor as nicking the queens swan soufflé. Even if it was used right there's always the one innocent person who gets killed and they find out years later...Can't exactly send them a pardon along with a big box of chocolates can they? And then look at the countried that actually have the death penalty...Do they have better crime rates? No, They do not...If I was going to be sentanced to death after killing someone i'd be slightly inclined to take as much as i could before going because I can't make it any worse for myself can i? Anyway what sort of methods would we use? We don't have any electric chairs and nipple tweaking people to death isn't very practical is it...and if you do decide to go ahead in bringing back the death penalty make sure you test them on yourself...You may not be around to see it but labour will certainly become more popular for it and don't fret we will send you a big box of chocolates! although you are dead now which probably messes that up a wee bit...