Written by matwil
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Friday, 18 September 2009

image for Q & A: US missile defence of Europe The flag of the colony the British didn't want. Wonder why ...

The USA had signed a deal with Poland, forcing it to install missiles at a base on the Baltic Sea.

The deal formed part of a plan to make Americans feel tough against what they call 'rogue states' such as Iran, states that Europeans call 'a joke'. But now they've had to shelve their plans, as not even Poles want American missiles on their soil.

What was the US proposing to do?

The US said the defence system was for the unlikely event of ballistic missiles being fired at places like Poland from places like Iran, or even more absurdly missiles being fired at Poland from the other side of the planet from North Korea. Though why such countries would do such a thing is unclear, if not laughable nonsense

Why in Eastern Europe?

Western European countries already have massive conventional and nuclear defence systems, especially France and Britain, Eastern European ones don't. So the USA was trying to look like it's 'policing the world' by handing over a lot of unwanted defence missiles to countries nobody is interested in or interested in attacking, like Poland and Czechoslovakia

But European countries could be threatened by Iran or Iraq one day, Washington said, meaning Americans feel threatened by Iraq and Iran. Europeans have fought and won wars for thousands of years against one another and against outside invaders, but ooh we're so scared of Iraq, a harmless place invented in 1921 by Britain. A place run by bandits that the Americans of course can't defeat

Did it work?

Did what work? Did Americans believe all this bullshit propaganda? Of course they did, the fact that the USA can't win wars and is scared of 3rd World nobodies like Iran means they swallowed all this crap too. Europeans don't need American 'defence', Americans need propaganda, hence the plan for missiles being sent to Poland and CNN reporting it as important to Europeans. It wasn't and isn't

Why did Russia object?

Because Russia is a European country, the USA isn't. The USA might possibly object if Russia set up ballistic missile sites in Mexico

How serious is the threat to Europe?

What threat?

Why did Poland not agree to the plan?

Because the Polish are a tough, independent people that don't want American missiles on their soil, especially as it might annoy the Russians - another tough, independent people. Americans are not a tough, independent people

So why don't Americans stick to making movies about winning wars they never did, instead of annoying Europeans who have been running the modern world - including America - for centuries?

Good point. Er ... well, it makes Americans look important to, er, Americans. You know, like - like when the USA joined 2 World Wars after the British had won them and made movies showing Americans winning them. I mean ...

Haven't Americans realised yet that the Cold War was Western Europeans and Eastern Europeans conning billions of dollars out of naive Yanks? Only Americans ever believed the Soviet Union would attack Western Europe, but thanks for all the aircraft and nukes anyway

I'll have you know, sir, that -

Aah, away and go and invent your own language, culture, and a 500-year old Empire that rules the world

If you're suggesting that the USA is a dumping ground for idiots who believe their own propaganda and have never won a war, and keep getting conned by the British, Israelis, Russians, French and Spanish into doing what they tell them to and sending them weapons and money, then the USA will have to do what it has always does in times of war

Loses?

And avoids fighting them. But still has a flag, wow

Tough people, those Americans

The mightiest country in the world

Even the Polish are telling Americans where to get off, sounds like a case of the emperor's new clothes to the rest of the world, that the USA is now seen as what it really is now the Soviet Union no longer exists

Well, you know that and we know that, but we need TV propaganda to get the 99% of Americans who believe American TV news is true to keep on thinking that the world quakes in fear at the name of the mighty United States of America

Great comedy!

Next week we're going to try and invade Vietnam/Iraq/Cuba/Korea/Grenada, get beaten, try and force some tiny European countries to take our ballistic missile sites, get told to clear off, then make a Hollywood blockbuster movie on 'how the USA polices and rules the world'. Starring Donald Duck and Lassie!

And Americans will believe it, and weep into their flags on the 4th of whenever

Yep

Surely only morons would believe all that patriotic American horseshit?

Hey, we elected George W. Bush as our leader. And Ronald Reagan and Jimmy Carter. Don't call us morons!

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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