Written by Bureau
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Sunday, 5 July 2009

This morning Pope Benedict XVI announced that he had received a note from Saint Peter that, if it's not too much trouble, would you have them to hold off with the celebrity deaths for awhile.

The note continued to say:

While Farrah is only admiring herself and her reflection in the streets of gold even outside the gate, she won't get her wings until all her records have been checked carefully. She may have been OK for "Charley" but up here we rely on more than looks.

Then there's Jackson who is light as a feather and dancin all over the place. If you liked "moon walking" you're gonna love "cloud walking", "golden gate walking" and he can't wait to get in and dance on the ceiling with Fred Astaire.

Ed McMahon is still chatting through the gates with Carson and I've heard "Heeerrreee's Johnny!" till I could Puke but we don't do that here..not even Karen Carpenter.

Finally there's the guy with the big mouth still yammering how we can clean stuff up here. I told him to zip it for now and everyone and everything IS clean up here..but I bought some of his stuff just to quiet him down.

So, hold off the celebrity compost until we can get these through.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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