Written by rfreed
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Tuesday, 10 March 2009

image for Republicans Search For A New Reagan Rush Limbaugh As A Result Of Running Out Of Gray Paint.

The Republicans are desperately searching for new leadership. After Bush won two elections, they thought they had the perfect leader, one who could fool all the people all the time, or at least the ones with the votes and the money that counted. But towards the end he not only rocked the boat but managed to sink it.

"What about McCain?" mused Pate Riat, chairman for the Republican Search for a New Fuhrer Committee.

"Forget him! After the drubbing he got in the election, he's gone. Besides, he's so left leaning even his underwear is blue!" stated To Tala Tarian, main Repub spin doctor.

"Cheney?"

"No way. He's over taken Darth Vader as the incarnation of evil in the publics imagination."

"Ann Coulter?"

"She'd be burned as a witch in the first two weeks."

"Michael Steele?"

"Come on! We set him up with the Chairmanship of the Republican Committee to try to siphon off some of Obama's popularity. It worked with using Palin as a Hillary clone, but we're pushing it already having a black man anywhere near the top controls of the Republican party. So what does that leave us with?"

A few thoughtful seconds pass.

"Is Reagan's son around anywhere?"

"Yes, but he's still doing ballet."

"That won't work. And of course Cheney's daughter would have to be gay."

"I guess that leaves us with Rush Limbaugh. At least he's the right size."

"Yeah, I guess he'll have to do. Put a rubber trunk and a tail on him and paint him gray. Have him before the cameras at 10 tomorrow."

"Can do."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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