Written by colin hal
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Tuesday, 29 June 2004

image for Cover Songs, don't you just hate them?

Cover songs

So what can you do when these crap boy bands that prove to be crapper every time have run out of ideas after their second album so they start singing cover songs that sound the same way they did 20 years ago and now they are in the no.1 spot they win the best award for song writing and you know that your going to find 7 cover songs on their greatest hits album?!!

Well the answer is you can’t do anything. Every time you’re waiting for your favourite song to appear on MTV you’re bombarded by West life, Will Young, Gareth Gates, Steps, Back Street, Nsync, Britney spears, Christina Aguilera, videos the list is endless.

That’s right; don’t complain about my grammar I am making stand here!

One time I was on the bus, as usual the bus driver got us in a jam, so I started singing to calm myself.

The song I chose was Robbie Williams “My Way”, don’t know why but it just seemed like a relaxing song.

Suddenly some old man joins in; he was way too un-cool to be singing along.

“Hey you killed the song man!” I shrieked.

“Sorry but I love Frank Sinatra” he said.

“Frank who? This is a Robbie Williams song old one, so don’t go there!” I explained.

So I decided to sing another Robbie Williams song “Freedom” as soon as I started singing it the old man called out “George Michael”.

I sang another Robbie Williams song “She’s the one” and the old man called out “World Party”.

This really boiled my blood, because there is no way I would want to associate myself with this old man, I’m a young hip cat and this is an old square we’re talking about.

“Ok, you’re so cool, who wrote eternity?” I asked.

“100% human” he said.

“No it can’t be you’re lying!!!” I started to cry in disbelief.

So that night I looked up all the songs Robbie Williams had released and wanted to know whether they were his or not.

I was so surprised to find out this guy was a complete biatch!

He’s ripped off the pet shop boys, George Michael and even Adam and the ants!

Is he being called a grave robber for copying the same exact songs the same exact way they were first released 20 years ago? No! He was voted as the most important man in music by MTV, above Michael Jackson, Elvis Presley, John Lennon, and ironically George Michael the same man Robbie Williams ripped off for his debut song appeared as no.8 in that same survey!

Ok if you think I am a whiney bitch take a look at the list of some songs Rob the man ripped off:

Antmusic by Adam and the Ants

Eternity by 100% human

Freedom by George Michael

It was a good year by Frank Sinatra

My way by Frank Sinatra

Well did you evah? By Frank Sinatra et al

Wonderwall by Oasis

We are the champions by Queen

There she goes by The La’s

She’s the one by World Party

Mac the Knife by Bobby Darin

Rollin by Limp Bizkit

Something stupid by Frank Sinatra

This isn’t even a complete list this site http://www.coversproject.com/artist/Robbie+Williams will make every Robbie Williams fan throw up.

There are musicians and bands I’ve never even heard off, why do you think he’s robbing them? This is because these dumb ten year old kids get so much pocket money and go out to record stores to buy these lame ass cover songs.

It’s not like he sings like an angel, he keeps showing off his tattoo covered body, the guy thinks he’s got some sort of fit body just like ray in Big Brother.

Put some clothes on! You guys out there who were sending text messages to Big Brother saying Ray was fit need to put your mobile phones on high vibration and stick it up your ass!

Don’t you know Robbie Williams just tries to show off his body but he makes it seem like he’s just acting witty? My granddad has a better body then this clown!

I bet if you tried to get ring tones for Frank Sinatra’s “something stupid” you’ll find it under Robbie Williams featuring Nicole Kidman.

That’s another thing that pisses me off actors thinking they can sing, fat ugly people like Kate Winslet, Ewan Mcgregor trying to sing “What cum may”

I mean what the fuck?

What about Huey Lewis and Gwnyneth Paltrow singing “Cruisin”, someone ought to put them in a car and drive them off a cliff!

The thing is its not only Robbie Williams who’s made a lot of profits from ripping other musicians, what about West life and Boyzone, I’d have to make a complete site just to display how many artists they ripped off.

The funny thing is they release charity cover songs; wow what a bunch of nice guys, a fraction of the money they make will go to the poor. Isn’t that a nice way to winning peoples hearts? Releasing a song that you didn’t even make that you didn’t even put your heart into it.

Tell that to a fucking preteen who’s walking down Ladbroke grove with his hand down his pants!

I bet if we asked these artists why they keep stealing songs they’d say “so we steal so what? So far so good!”

http://www.hollandparkeschool.netfirms.com/


The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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