NEW YORK - As related to TheSpoof by Rundudu Fufoomak.
I always carried a full pound of aspartame in a quick release pouch in my purse, just in case. Now, I'm never without the stuff at a meal, or even in the shower or tub.
It happened one day when I was walking home from work through Harlem on the way to the Bronx. I had skipped lunch.
I sort of stand out, being from Twawtsylvania; I have all the odd features of my native people.
I could feel the eyes of the gang members on my back as I walked past them.
Then I heard the footsteps, and the snickers.
I turned and flung the pound of aspartame on their snickers, which they ate, killing them s-l-o-w-l-y.
Yes, thanks to aspartame, I'm alive today.
Available in pure form on Ebray in a handy purse pack or shoulder holster