Written by Onionuttapam
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Wednesday, 5 November 2008

image for Bush exit will be a huge blow to comedians all over the world

With US presidential results declared, while the entire world is feeling relieved that the eight-year rule of George W Bush, marred by disastrous wars, massive foreign policy blunders and near-economic ruin of his nation is coming to an end, his exit has come as a huge blow to the ever-burgeoning tribe of stand-up comedians, cartoonists, jokesters, satirists, youtubers, anti-bush merchandisers, Jon Stewart, Stephan Colbert, Jay Leno, Conan O Brien, David Letterman and millions of others humorists all over the world who over the last eight years have become highly dependent on the outgoing US president to provide them with their daily gags and laughs.

While the rest of the world is celebrating the departure of George W Bush, surely one of the least popular American presidents, easily the most hated US president ever and undoubtedly the dumbest ever president of any country of the world, humorists of all hues and kinds are mourning the loss of the biggest supplier of jests, capers and comic material.

"Bush was a one-man army" quipped television anchor and stand-up comedian, Jay Leno, "He was a single-stop resource for thousands of gags, one-liners and witticisms. I will miss him very much" sobbed Leno.

David Letterman, anchor of Late Show with David Letterman, broke down during the middle of his show and cried, "I'm afraid my three-decade long career as a stand-up comedian might come to an inglorious end with the end of Bush presidency. For the last few years, every morning when I used to wake up with cold sweat wondering what I would write for the day's show, the picture frame of goofy-looking Dubya on my desk would cheer me up and reassure me that as long as this joker was in office, there would never be any shortage of jokes. Now with Dubya all set to depart from White House, I just hate waking up"

According to industry observers, television ratings of most of comic shows on networks are set to fall drastically the moment Bush leaves office. One of the producers of The Colbert Report was inconsolable. "Dubya's exit is a huge disaster for us. While dumbed-down Americans will continue to provide enough laughs for the writers of our show to capitalize on, it wouldn't be the same without Bush. We are witnessing an end to one of the most glorious era of political comedy. The world of comedy will never be the same again"

The impact of the exit of outgoing US president should not be underestimated. George W Bush virtually redefined the rules of comedy writing by lowering the barriers for entry in the comedy-writing business. Earlier writing comedy was a highly skilled art practised only by a proficient few. But after George W Bush was appointed as US president, writing comedy became much easier allowing millions of amateurs to enter the field.

"The mushrooming of humor and satire websites all over the world during the last few years is proof of how much easier it has become for unskilled, amateur humorists to penetrate the world of humor-writing. Even in humor-challenged countries like India, where people are excessively touchy and easily offended over trivial matters, we are witnessing substandard clones of The onion coming up" observed Tim Keck, one of the founders of the path-breaking satirical website, theonion.com.

Comedians all over the world are hoping that Bush will keep making gaffes and continue providing laughs even after his retirement. But they also realize that making fun of a powerless, dethroned, retired president is not half as much fun as making fun of the man occupying the most powerful chair in the world. Many are hoping against hope that post-retirement he will be offered some high diplomatic post, possibly at United Nations which will keep him in limelight for few more years. But considering his track record of unprovoked wars, it is highly unlikely that any peace-keeping organization would risk hiring him.

With the entire world displaying marked hostility towards the outgoing president, it is quite likely that Bush may decide to take refuge in India. Convinced by Indian Prime Minister Manmohan Singh that the 'people of India deeply love' him, he might feel encouraged to shift his home base to India where he can be assured of Indians loving him deeply and worshiping him with all the reverence that they reserve for white masters.

If that comes to pass, at least the humorists operating from India can be assured of a steady supply of many more years of gaffes and laughs.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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