Talledega AL - Jimmie Johnson, who has his own cap, sez "its high time that NASCAR got wit da times and put some pizzazz back inta racin. Racins done got a bit toooo pradictable 'specially with me winnun an all. We need some highlights, some new kind of 'traction to motivate."
"Me and Bobby-Joe Johnson were thinking one day. Magine, us two thinkun at the same time . . . tagether!"
"That's when it hit us, well Bobby-Joe was the one that thunk it up first."
"Everybody talks about things startin from the gitgo but nobody's done seen one."
"Well Bobby-Joe reckons there was a family of Gitgos down in the valley where he grew up but we figure that warn't it. There was a girl in the family tho, had a tarrible rash, her mommy said she had the gitgo, made her take hot baths and put molasses on it."
"Then I figgured gitgos got to be a thing like a monkey wrench or a plumbers snake or a snack like Cheetos, most likely a snack tho, maybe those bugle shaped ones that are sooo tastee!"
"Just as I was talkin like that Bobby-Joe scratched his ass and pulled out a lizard just as fine and green as could be. Well I never done seen an ass-lizard before so my eyes went way wide! We took it as a sign. We knew that be a gitgo sho-nuff."
"Now we starts the races with a big splash. Bobby-Joe dresses up in a giant lizard costume and waves a flag to all those cars to gitgoing."
"That be the newsflash, right Bobby?"