Written by Judge Retort
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Saturday, 11 October 2008

image for Will Palin handle a big election?

Nagging questions are beginning to surface regarding the VP pick of John Charlemagne McCaine and his first paladin Sarah Palin.

Will she be able to handle his election?

If she doesn't handle his election, are their any other gals who are willing?

Why did Obama want Joe Biden to handle his election and not Hillary? Is he truly then metrosexual?

What does this say about all past Presidents who, without exception, chose men to handle their elections?

Walter Mondale took a big chance asking Geraldine Ferraro to handle his election. The first gal to handle the biggest election in the land! And she did it with a smile. However, their loss was the biggest election let down in Presidential history. Sure brought that big smile to Ronald Reagan's puss!

This is an ironic mystery.

Plenty of energetic women have handled gubernatorial elections.

Plenty handle mayoral elections all year round.

Sarah Palin is on top! She has handled a state gubernatorial election, handled a mayoral election (this wasn't a big election, according to her opposition), and now this amazing gal is handling the biggest election of her life-happily and with a smile as big as Alaska itself!

I really have to hand it to women.

They give birth, they raise kids, they tolerate men, they make money, they communicate faster and with far greater bandwidth (that's where men got the idea behind 'broadband'), evangelicals now claim there is Biblical proof in the book of Genesis that women are actually v2.0 -- not evangelical legalists, of course -- and now in the last few generations, on top of all these other responsibilities, women are handling major elections and with far greater frequency. And coming out on top more and more!

It could just be that in the 21st century, men may not be able to handle elections anymore at all, leaving the "family politic" completely sterile.

This is the nation's biggest election, and it is good that the end of the election is November 4th and it's not any longer.

Or, perhaps we're just taking this whole messy election too far...

...In other news, sales of Palin commemorative eyeglasses are skyrocketing at Lensbusters and other retail outlets. Oddly, 99% of purchases are reported to be by men as gifts for their wives and girlfriends. Rosie O'Donnell and Ellen DeGeneres alone account for the remaining 1%. No truth to the rumor they were in the same Malibu store at the same time, though Ellen was reported to have carried hers out in a nondescript brown paper bag.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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