Just ask, and we'll bail you out.
No matter who you're: AIG, FNM, FRE…
Lehman Brothers, get a bridge loan quick and help is coming.
1 billion to Georgia even you did not ask.
Use it to dig a big hole to sink Russian tanks before they crush your police cruisers.
See the incredible results.
Instead of 9 out of 10 voters lose his job, only 1.
Instead of 9 out of 10 investors jump out of the window, only 1.
How to get the bail money?
Most voters do not know 1 billion from 1 million. Until some idiot explains 1 billion is equal to a 12 pack for each voter.
Or, just speed up the money-printing machine. Until they spend $1,000 for a French champagne.
Or, ask the Chinese to loan us more money. Until our credit cards from China are all maxed out.
The best solution: sell Alaska to Russia.
Republicans declare great success in buy low and sell high.
Democrats agree finally, as long as no Russian governor as our vice president.
How hard to write a check to solve a 'big' problem?