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Tags: Avon, Nose, Pope

Sunday, 23 March 2008

image for Dingleberry Shaped Like The Pope's Nose Sells for Thousands on E-Bay Genevieve Ass-Scratcher, Cockamamie Eisenhowser and Maisie Van der Built

Genevieve Ass-Scratcher of Hopalong-on-Avon found a dingleberry that had a particular and curious shape.

Down to the pub she ran and there her cribbage partners, Maisie Van der Built and Cokamamie Eisenhowser identified the mass as a dead ringer for the nose of the sixteenth Pope Benedict.

Back to the hovel and on to the computer the lasses registered the remnant on E-bay as an exact replica of the 16th Pope Benedict's proboscis and actually found stuck to the ass-hairs of a lady from Hopalong-on- Avon. (Reader excuse as E-bay requires such graphic details of origin as to verify authenticity.)

Well the ladies played some cribbage with one eye on the E-bay and one on the cribbage. Hour upon hour, the bids mounted as the dingleberry went from hundreds to thousands. There was no controllin their glee when the turd vestige broke the ten thousand dollar mark.

Ironically in all their excitement the ladies failed to keep account of the exact location of the incredible remnant of Genevieve's morning constitutional. But as the bids kept pouring in the ladies knew they couldn't let their proverbial shit leave harbor without them. What to do was answered by three stout hearted lassies searching their behinds for another remarkable tracer of Vatican notoriety. Believe it or not, Miss Van der Built emerged triumphant holding aloft just a berry as the first with amazing nasal verisimilitude to said Pontiff.

By then the bids had burst forth to hundreds of thousands and the three ladies decided to the split the lot and retire to days on end of endless cribbage games with some careful examinations of the next propitious payload.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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