Written by Tiki Murphy
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Wednesday, 5 March 2008

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Here are ten good ways to make sure that a Jehova's Witness leaves you alone.

  1. Tell them that you can't talk right now. Satan is visiting.
  2. Open the door naked and ask for a threesome.
  3. Ask if they can come back at midnight, your coven would be interested in what they have to say.
  4. Tell them God told you not to talk to them.
  5. Invite them in, and ask if they want to stay for the ritual sacrifice.
  6. Tell them you have to ask the Pope if it's ok if you talk to them.
  7. Offer to help them buy a car.
  8. Offer to do a tarot card reading for them.
  9. Tell them you have already been promised the best room in Hell.
  10. Tell them they can come in but you charge by the hour.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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