Written by Tiki Murphy
Rating:

Share/Bookmark
Print this

Monday, 3 March 2008

image for "What Goes On In a Woman's Head" Study. With this study, hopefully one of these men will score.

A Duke University study has shown some insight into the mind of women. They have not 'cracked the code', but they are now understanding more about what women mean when they say certain things. Offering $1,000 to 100 subjects, researchers have found out the meaning to the following:

1. 'If you don't know, I'm not telling'= 'I have no idea. I am in a bad mood and you are handy.'

2. 'Does this make me look fat?'= This one has found be very tricky. It means they want you to lie as honestly as possible. For this you need to practice false sincerity. For example: 'Honey, there is nothing in this world that could make that smokin' body of yours look or be fat.' Now you must say this with a straight face and the utmost sincerity in your voice.

3.'I'll take a dinner salad, no dressing, with lemon on the side.'= 'God! I am hungary, but I want him to think that I am actually watching my weight. I hope this date ends early enough to order a pizza. I think I still have some ice cream in the fridge. Damn, he's cute'

4.'I'll have the dinner salad to start, lots of dressing, then the steak and lobster, to top it off the cherries jubilee.'= 'What a loser. If he thinks I am gonna go out with him again, he is sadly mistaken.'

And the final one they have uncovered...

5.'I just need to powder my nose, I'll be right back.'= "Susan help! Get me the hell out of here. Call my cell tell me my goldfish died or something. Please hurry. It's a nightmare.'

The study is on going, and there are high hopes that more will be uncovered. The American Medical Journal will be publishing this research within the next six months. They are hoping that with this research that men will finally have the upper hand.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!
Print this

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story

Share/Bookmark

72 readers are online right now!

Go to top