Written by Jacob Baker
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Saturday, 16 February 2008

image for Self-confessed fat woman Self-confessed fat woman

Boy-lady lesbian confesses to being fat and not having a boyfriend because men don't want freaks of nature.

"I am a fat person. There. I've said it. Did it shock you?"

I'm fat. I'm also tall, strong, fair-skinned, green-eyed, and have long brown hair with red highlights and strands of silver coming in around my face. I have a strong, pleasant voice, terrible eyesight, straight teeth, long fingers, and high cheekbones. Now why is it that none of that matters as much or is as memorable as the fact that I'm fat?

Many people seem to think fat is a dirty word. They'll dance around it, try to avoid the subject, and get embarrassed if a fat person refers to herself as fat. I don't really understand why, but I figure it's tied in with our society's generally dysfunctional attitudes about bodies, especially women's bodies, in general.

Fat isn't a moral issue. The word in and of itself isn't an insult - it's a description. Humans come in lots of varieties - tall, short, brown, pink, slender - and fat - and they're all just fine.

I haven't necessarily chosen to be fat. I have chosen to get off the dieting merry-go-round, because both personal experience and a multitude of medical studies have shown that dieting simply does not work and is not healthy.

I wasn't always fat. I only weighed about 120 pounds (a size 6/8 for me) when when I was 18, but I remembering thinking that I looked like a cow, and wouldn't be pretty until I got rid of those horrible big hip and rib bones that were poking out. I'm much happier with myself and my body now than then, and I know I'm healthier.

No, I haven't managed to fully overcome anti-fat programming that's all around me. I still have things to work on. There are days when I don't like my body, when I'm tempted to try again to lose weight. Sizist remarks still get to me at times - but those times are becoming more and more rare.

A young handsome boy said, "We know your an ugly fat lady but when will you start wearing a paper bag over your head?"

Asked if she would ever find a boyfriend, she said when guys start asking her out on a date then she might finally get laid. I as a reporter would not like to be seen in public with this fat woman.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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