Written by Henman
Rating:

Share/Bookmark
Print this

Thursday, 3 January 2008

image for American Lawyers

The following questions by lawyers were taken from actual court documents in America:


"Was that the same nose you broke as a child?"


"Now doctor, is it not true that when a person dies in his sleep, in most cases he just passes quietly away and doesn't know anything about it until the next morning?"


Q: "What happened then?"
A: "He told me, 'I have to kill you because you can identify me.'"
Q: "And did he kill you?"


"Was it you or your brother that was killed in the war?


"The youngest son, the twenty year old, how old is he?"


"Were you alone or by yourself?"


"Do you have any children or anything of that kind?"


Q: "I show you exhibit 3 and ask you if you recognize that picture?"
A: "That's me."
Q: "Were you present when he picture was taken?"


"Were you present in court this morning when you were sworn in?"


Q: "Mrs. Johnson, how was your first marriage terminated ?"
A: "By death."
Q: "And by whose death was it terminated?"


Q: "Do you know how far pregnant you are now?"
A: "I'll be three months on November 8th."
Q: "Apparently then, the date of conception was August 8th?
A: "Yes."
Q: "What were you doing at that time?


"So you were gone until you returned?"


Q: "She had three children right?"
A: "Yes."
Q: "How many were boys?"
A: "None."
Q: "Were there any girls?"


"Mrs. Jones, how many times have you committed suicide?"


"You don't know what it was, and you didn't know what it looked like, but can you describe it?"


Q: "You say the stairs went down to the basement?"
A: "Yes."
Q: "And these stairs, did they go up also?"


Q: "Do you recall approximately the time that you examined the body of Mr. Edington at the Rose Chapel?"
A: "The autopsy started about 8:30 p.m."
Q: "And Mr. Edington was dead at that time?"

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!
Print this

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story

Share/Bookmark

58 readers are online right now!

Go to top