Written by Mark
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Tuesday, 9 October 2007

image for Elvis was Son of God; Toilet Incident was Devil's Work The Devil's Work!

It has been revealed that Elvis was not only The King of Rock and Roll, but also The King of All Mankind.

Perhaps this revelation goes some way in explaining Elvis' many and varied apparitions, and his vast following of disciples.

In his lifetime, Elvis was tempted many times by the Devil. In his previous incarnation as Jesus, the Son of God had dismissed Satan's attempts to woo him to the dark side; he wasn't likely to make the same mistake twice!

Satan tempted The King many times, but it was the Son of God's penchant for burgers which finally got him. According to hidden scriptures, the "Forbidden Fruit" quoted in genesis, was actually a small patty of minced meat, obtained from a variety of God's sacred animals.

In return for his loyalty, the Devil revealed to Elvis a magical dance move that would make him irresistible to anyone, and so his celebrity career began.

During his life, Elvis performed very few documented miracles. His most well known work was the "Blowing up of the Television" miracle. It was supposed to be the "Changing of the TV channel" miracle but, according to theologians, he had was very drunk at the time.

Elvis, along with Jesus, remain two of the most popular and influential entertainers of all time.

Elvis died at the age of 42, while eating God's forbidden hamburger on the toilet. This was the same age, believed by many scholars, as Jesus at his death.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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