Written by when_nature_calls
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Wednesday, 10 October 2007

image for Super Size Me? HELL YA! Wow, I'm lovin' it.

(Sacramento, Calif)- Remember the ground breaking documentary where Morgan Spurlock tried to eat nothing but McDonald's for 30 straight days? Me too, is that guy the biggest dumbfuck or what?

Everone knows that 30 straight days of nothing but Mcdonald's is gross, but what people dont realize is that your body can't handle that much McDonald's. We as Americans need a little pizzazz in our daily life, so eat Taco Bell or Sonic or Wendy's, but not Burger King because any moron can tell that Burger King and McDonald's are the same resturant except that McDonald's fries dont suck.

When asked about the differences between McDonald's and Burger King's fries former Vice President Al Gore was outspoken by saying: "What horseshit fast food company does not use salt on their fries? Come on, first Global Warming and now this? Seriously the 3 pilars of the American Fast Food Economy are salt, calories and the pursuit of fatness, look it up it is in the damn Declaration of Body-Mass-Index."

"We are a fast food nation and we should be proud of it." writes Ben Franklin in his will.

Wait? You dont know how Ben Franklin died? Well I will give you a hint, it wasnt an OD on Whoppers, he tripped over the Taco Bell dog and ... i'm sure Nick Cage will tell us in National Treasure 2.

The statistics are staggering, 90 percent of Jewish and Muslim kids, when asked to point out Jesus in a line-up of characters, including Mr. Rogers, CatDog, Jaleel White and Jesus would sooner pick Steve Urkel than Jesus.

This begs the question: "Do you want to Super Size that?" And the alarming answer is that yes kids virtually live off McDonald's, but all I'm am asking you is the next time you get hungry, think outside the bun.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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